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May 30
Just moved to THE SUNNY OKANAGAN. NOW THIS IS THE
PLACE TO LIVE.
Beautiful sunny days and warm balmy evenings. What a place! It's a
fabulous place to be.
I've finally found my home. I love it here.
June 14
Really heating up. Got to 100 today. Not a problem. I live in an
air-conditioned home, drive an air-conditioned car. What a pleasure to see the sun every day like
this. I'm turning into a sun worshipper.
June 30
Had the backyard landscaped with western plants today. Lots of cactus
and rocks. What a breeze to maintain. No more mowing lawn for me. Another scorcher today, but I
love it here.
July 10
The temperature hasn't been below 100 all week. How do people get
used to this kind of heat? At least it's kind of windy though. But getting used to it, the heat is
taking longer than I expected.
July 15
Fell asleep by the community pool. Got third degree burns over 60% of
my body. Missed 3 days of work. What a dumb thing to do. I learned my lesson though. Got to respect
the ol' sun in a climate like this.
July 20
I missed Furby (my cat) sneaking into my car when I left this
morning. By the time I got to the hot car at noon, Furby had died and swollen up to the size of a
shopping bag and stunk up the upholstery. The car now smells like Kibbles and Shits. I learned my
lesson though. No more pets in this heat!
July 25
The wind sucks! It feels like a giant freaking blow dryer. And it's
hot as hell!!!!! The home air-conditioner is on the fritz and the A/C repairman charged $200 just
to drive by and tell me he needed to order parts.
July 30
Been trying to sleep outside on the patio for 3 nights now. The damn
mosquitoes are sending all their relatives to me for a buffet dinner. A $379,000 house and I can't
even go inside. Why did I ever come here?
August 4
It's 105 degrees. Finally got the air-conditioner fixed today. It
cost $500 and gets the temperature down to 85. I hate this stupid city.
August 8
If another wise-ass cracks, "Hot enough for you today?" I'm going to
strangle him. Damn heat. By the time I get to work the radiator is boiling over, my clothes are
soaking wet, and I smell like freaking baked cat!!
August 9
Tried to run some errands after work. Wore shorts and when I sat on
the seats in the car, I thought my ass was on fire. I lost 2 layers of flesh and all the hair on
the back of my legs and ass. Now my car smells like burnt hair, fried ass and baked cat.
August 10
The weather report might as well be a damn recording. Hot and sunny!
Hot and sunny! Hot and sunny!
It's been too hot to do shit for 2 damn months and the weatherman
says it might really warm up next week.
Doesn't it ever rain in this desert? Water rationing will be next, so
my $1700 worth of cactus will just dry up and blow over. Even the cactus can't live in this damn
heat.
August 14
Welcome to HELL!!
Temperature got to 115 today. Forgot to crack the window and blew the
windshield out of the car. The installer came to fix it and said, "Hot enough for you today?" My
Mom had to spend $1500 to bail me out of jail.
Freaking OKANAGAN!! What kind of sick demented idiot would want to
live here??
Will write later to let you know how the trial
went.
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